Wander Why so many Blah Blahs???

I feel sick sick sick… haven’t had fever for quite some years.  I was just wondering if i’m just getting stronger the past few years.  Then, BHAM! I got sore throat and fever today.. instantly.  Hehe.. was just thinking maybe I can shed some pounds over the weekend.  True enough, I had diarrhea last week then fever this week. Yeah right.  God do answer prayers. HEHE.. I just wish I’ll be able to recover as soon as possible coz I really wanna look good this sunday on my friend’s wedding.  I was just hoping I’ll be able to experience being an ‘abay’ before I get hitched myself.  And again, God heard my prayers and gave me 2 abay opportunities this year.

Gotta get some rest… Have to work tomorrow…  I envy those people working or studying in manila coz they get another day off tomorrow (Manila Day).  In Makati, there’s no such holiday.  Makati day is just another busy day where people block the streets and make life of workers (esp. those who have to commute through public transportation) worse than ever.

Talking about lots of friends getting hitched this year.  Just came back from the wedding bash of my friends Sherjiff and Liezl.  Congratulations to both of them!  So far, this is the 3rd wedding I’ve attended for this year.  And there are still 5 more weddings to come.  I wonder what’s with year 2005?   Anyways, both the bride and the groom were my officemates for 7.5 years in the previous company.  Hence, I got the chance to meet my ex-colleagues in the reception, including my previous boss.  Just feels so good to see old faces again….

It’s another tiring week. In a glimpse, we’re already half way through year 2005.  Classes started again and streets are getting busier each day. The past 6 months just slipped away like turning pages of a book.  And admittedly, I’ve already flipped through half the pages of the book in my life.  I don’t know if this is what you call mid-life crisis. I feel lost and I feel scared.  Scared of what? Scared of what the future lies ahead.  See, during the teenage years, I’ve always wanted to grow up quickly so that I can taste the gift of freedom given to adults.  I look forward to life each with day with excitement.  I wanna grow up.  I wanna have a boyfriend.  I wanna have a job.  I wanna go out without curfew.  I wanna buy the things I like without asking for mom’s donation.  Now I’m here.  I’m glad I’m currently enjoying the things I’ve always longed for.  Everything seems to be perfect.  But.. a big big BUT.  Apart from all the above mentioned, there’s another thing I have right now that I didn’t ask for. I don’t want to accept it but I have to.  That is RESPONSIBILITY.  A simple 14 letter word but yet it can totally make your life go from east to west, and from north to south.  With responsibility, there comes EXPECTATION.  With expectation, there comes PRESSURE.  What else?  Are there more?  Life is surely full of surprises.  Although I know that it is better to look forward, I really wish I could turn back the clock.  Back to the day when my shoulders aren’t fully loaded with things I have to do.  All I cared back then was how do I make crush fall in love with me. ehem… hehe of course that is apart from my studies and my barkadas.  I never even worried about the size of my boobs! haha.. now I do.  The thing I missed most about my younger years is the ability to cope with stress and pressure.  It’s like whatever happens, cool ka lang.  But now, I get worried often. RELAX seems like a hard thing to do. Days are filled with anxiety.  Anyhow, I still have to thank my BF and my friends for always listening to my never-ending stories.  If not because of everybody around me, life would have been more miserable.  They’re like icing on a cake.  See, they cover the entire cake with sweetness. J  Sometimes I do ask God, why me?  Why am I different from the others?  But I realized, that doesn’t make me feel any better.  I read a forwarded email from a friend today regarding how we make choices in life.  We choose to be happy?  Or choose to be miserable?  It’s easier said than done.  But I see the power it gives to people that fret most of the time about the happenings in life.  It makes you think positively.  Just as what Forrest Gump said in the movie: "Life is like a box of chocolates.  You’ll never know what’cha gonna get." So, I’ll try my best to appreciate dark chocolates…